Standing on the Edge of Something Big

And the knot in my stomach begins to form into the size of a grapefruit. The thought of leaving this place has induced nausea on more than one occasion & I am less than thrilled to begin packing my belongings for my parents’ visit tomorrow afternoon.

Friends from Grantham & home ask me about Philadelphia and how my experience in the city has treated me, and this is where the stammering and incoherent phrases begin. I can’t sufficiently describe what I’ve been through in this place in order for those listening to successfully understand. Most of the time I receive courtesy smiles of “Oh, that’s nice” and confused stares of “And why do you like the city?”, and frustration builds up because of my lack of skills to describe this experience in a meaningful way. All I know is it has changed my soul for the better.

Is it the food from Penang and Café Estelle that has me mourning my loss? Or is it the scenery that I view on my long bike rides like the one below? I don’t know that I can pinpoint exactly one contributing factor that makes me sad to leave this place, but I do believe more than anything , it’s the people. The people of MCPC, the people of North Philadelphia, and the environment in which I’ve surrounded myself. It has all intertwined and formed an incredible patchwork that I can take with me to Grantham for my final year, knowing that I’ll be back soon.

As our talented friend Matt Lettieri wrote:

Bye Bye Dr. P & N.Ry

Such a pity, center city, riding the orange line.

Those good old times with pancakes at midnight

Saying why is it that all the fish die? Why is it that all the fish die?

So, with eight days to go, I’ll enjoy my final moments with some of the most influential & beautiful people I’ve met at Messiah. (Many thanks to the Petersons, N. Ryan Wilson, Kate Nicely, and some of the most wonderful friends I’ve made at Messiah for making this experience unforgettable.)